She broke the silence by saying, "You said you loved me. Was that true?" Yes!" I cried. "I do!" Then don't be ashamed," she said.Was that what I was? Ashamed? Had my upbringing brought me to this place, afraid of being who I was, desperately wanting to bed a girl who was barely a teen, all the while full of guilt, shame and repressed emotions?She leaned down and whispered, "Kiss me." After a long pause, she added, "Please."I surrendered and gathered her into my arms. The kiss was soft, sweet. We were all enjoying the morning session of the picnic.All of us were enjoying the morning tea with some light snacks as it was very beautiful place and we went to see the places around. There were lots of other groups as well, as it was the season for the picnic and the day was Saturday. Later on I saw a family near our spot, there were around 20 people and two young girls and they were looking at me. After having the lunch I went there and tried to talk with them. And we played the group. My parents still aren't back fromtheir Hawaii trip." "Okay, Daddy. Can I come over to sit next to you before we go?" Sure."She pulled up her shorts and came over to my side which faced the street and the houses and the expanse of the whole park. She sat next to me and put her head on my shoulder. It was nice and I was so hot and excited by what we just did--with her directing all the hot action. Without warning, she pulled her shorts down to her knees, leaned forward on the table, and with her. "We've been over this, Tammy. There is no Tim. Say it after me." There... is no Tim." Tim is a persona you created as a coping mechanism, in response to yourtraumatic experiences. The school janitor was caught installing cameras inthe restrooms, one of which recorded you. Your mortification about beingseen in such a vulnerable state caused you to invent this 'Tim' character,as a way of reclaiming power for yourself, becoming the voyeur instead ofhis victim."As she said it, I knew it was true. I.
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